Terrorist group ISIS threatens attack on popular eateries in Rio Grand Valley.

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Earlier this week, Abdul Rahma Sokimoto, leader of the world known terrorist group ISIS threatened to bomb several popular eateries like Krispy Kreme Donut stores as well as "taquerias" (restaurants which primarily serve tacos) through out the greater Rio Grande Valley area.

FBI official, John McLain states, "ISIS understands very well the importance donuts and tacos hold to the people of the RGV. Attacking historical landmarks or government buildings wouldn't have nearly half the effect as attacking something they love so much and quite possibly can't live without. This would definitely create terror, panic and raise tensions against Muslims to unprecedented levels." The Rio Grande Valley is statistically the most obese area in the nation with new donut shops opening up every month in every city. There are taquerias in just about every neighborhood in every city, as well.

With the recent news of 8 Syrian refugees caught at the Laredo border, Border Patrol Officials are on high alert. Border Patrol Agent David Hernandez stated, "We've brought more agents to the frontline to ensure we catch and process any more refugees trying to come in. We advise anyone to inform us of any suspicious activity they see near the river."

President Barack Obama plans to deploy troops within the next week to help safeguard the borders and prevent anyone from entering the states illegally.

Este es un sitio web satírico. No lo tomes en serio. Es una broma.

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